In the name of Allah, the most Loving, the Wise
I’ve never had a word of the year before but my word for this year is vulnerability. I decided late last year. I want to be sure that I am able to show up authentically, regardless of the company I’m in. To clarify, I’m not talking about lacking boundaries or necessarily walking around “with my heart on my sleeve.” Rather, it’s about being able to just be who I am, as I am. I hope that’s something that shines through here as well.
I have very mixed feelings about announcing pregnancy. A lot of people I know have waited 12 weeks to really tell anyone outside of their closest circle of people. Plenty of people also announce it as soon as they find out. Because my first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, just a couple days before we were going to expand our circle and even more after my second pregnancy ended in a miscarriage just a few days after my husband and I told our parents… we’ve been leaning more on the side of waiting.
After having a third miscarriage at the beginning of this year, I think I’m actually leaning to the other side. I know, that might sound crazy! I don’t think there needs to be shame or embarrassment in miscarriage. I don’t think there needs to be silence. There is a lot of pain. There’s a lot of healing to grow through. Healing through a miscarriage requires A LOT OF WORK!
If you’re reading this post and have had a miscarriage, my deepest condolences to you. Here are 7 holistic tops for healing after a miscarriage:
1. Allow yourself time and space to process all the feelings that come along with your experience.
We all will have different feelings that come along with having a miscarriage. Sadness, disappointment, grief, shame. It is crucial, in order to heal, that we allow ourselves to acknowledge all the things that come up so we can allow them to pass through. We can’t move through something if we try to act like it’s not there.
2. Recognize that, though the outcome is very different, this is still your postpartum period.
You need to rest your body and allow time for recovery. Not only is there pain in your body, there’s pain in your heart – there might be pain in your home, in your marriage, in your family. Along with holding space for yourself emotionally and spiritually, you need to allow your body to heal as well. This will look different for each individual but this is the time to really tune into your body and listen.
3. Make the time to connect and reconnect with your spouse.
We can go through this process very differently than our spouse. Not only is our experience of the event different, the way each person grieves and works through their feelings look different. It is important to reach out to each other, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and really lean into one another during this time. While it might seem like you should give each other space, now is not the time for that. There will likely be time where each of you need your own time to work through some stuff. Right now though, remember you both are on the same team, you both are sharing this experience. Be there for one another.
4. You’ll need to nourish your body.
It can feel like your body disappointed you at such an important time and you’re just at a loss. This is not the time to crash and burn; you need to be kind and loving to your body. This is a great time to stay hydrated, take your vitamins, and eat nourishing foods. It is the time to slowly cut back on some of the things you know aren’t the best choices for you and your health – caffeine, sugar, processed foods, etc. This is the time for warmth, massage and gentle movement.
5. Lean into your circle.
You and your spouse need to have people you can each lean on. Miscarriage is tough on its own but there can also be anxiety around fertility in general, growing your family, and things of that nature. There are a lot of things that come up, especially in the case of repeated miscarriage, for both of you. It’s so important that each of you have people who can offer a listening ear and wise counsel.
6. Vaginal Steaming!
All of these are practical tips and I hope they are very helpful. This last holistic tip for healing through your miscarriage is one of the most physical steps. You can do this. Right. Now. No matter what stage of healing you’re in. I’m not currently qualified to advise on the specifics of vaginal steaming but please look into it. It will help you heal physically and emotionally. It is a very connecting experience – to yourself, to your womb, to your femininity. It is not only healing from this experience, it is also incredibly healing of your overall reproductive system and can be a catapult to fertility wellness.
I hope that each of these tips is beneficial for you. I pray for deep healing for you. I know this is challenging but you have exactly the right amount of strength to get through.
Question for the comments: Please share your holistic tip to help moms who are going through a miscarriage to heal?
Thank you for stopping by ‘Nourishing Our Home’. Please be sure to pop in every Thursday for new posts. Also, if you found this to be relatable and beneficial, please help me out by sharing with your family and friends.